Lost in Motherhood: Where are you? (part 1)

I’ve written this first line several times and hit backspace several times. The truth is, I have questions myself, like, What do I say? Where do I start? I have started, stopped, re-started, re-thought, re-planned, re-focused, gave up, gained perspective and still couldn’t pull myself to set out to do the things for myself that I needed to do. I find myself trying to find balance everyday. Trying to find the perfect moment to write, to think, to progress, to plan, to do. Often times I simply try and run so far from this blog and my business but I can’t seem to let this go. It’s like there’s a mission that I must accomplish.

The pass few years since starting this blog and brand, my life has been one big world wind of various situations that I found myself (and my husband) in. And although physically I survived these situations, it seems that, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally I haven’t been the best at sustaining myself in those areas. Some days I wake up and I’m ready to take on the world. And then there are some days I just don’t want to face the world. And then there are days where I’m mad at the universe because my stars haven’t aligned. Most days I walk around stuck in between thoughts of business, motherhood, and self preservation amongst other things. I do know that often times I find myself at the mercy of others and what they need. Not to detour here but I absolutely love helping other people, that in essence helps me. And you can quote me on that! I seem to thrive off of helping others. Which brings me back to the whole point of this…Why I started this blog. And Why can’t I just let go of fear and just do what I’m passionate about and be happy expressing myself.

I remember as a little girl I would always “run my mouth” ( per my mom) but that was often met with little words like, “don’t pay her attention , she just talking” or “stop talking so much”, especially in school. By the time I got out of school, I had developed a slight discipline to only speak when spoken to, and to not speak/talk so much, especially around people I don’t know. Fast forward to today, I’m often quite shy and fearful. I have a hard time meeting new people and developing relationships through shared conversations. I went from being the kid who loved to win debates in class, to an adult who often hides from situations that requires talking and sharing difference of opinions. And just to keep it real, there are family members who would debate this because yes, around them, I am a talker! And with a wide range of opinions, most times unsolicited! But that’s family! I want to finally be able to share and be myself, not who others think I am suppose to be. I can only be motivated and inspired so many times to step out on faith and just keep going, so this time around I am going to give my all to being the best version of me no matter how many flaws, fears, and tears I have to share. No matter what I go through or went through in life thus far, I believe that there is a greater purpose to living and learning in your truth. And I hope that by doing so, I am able to inspire other moms to live their truth and love who they are and what they have. There is so much more to motherhood and I’m looking forward to this long but loving journey. I now look forward to really connecting with other moms who may share the same daily woes and struggles as I have. Being a woman and a mother is not easy, I totally underestimated as a child, what being a woman and mother is all about. Is motherhood a life you could really prepare for?  How do you find yourself when you feel lost in motherhood? As I explore this, stay tuned there’s more to come.

To connect with me and share your stories of motherhood and how this community can help inspire you, our email is imahautemom@gmail.com. You can also visit us on Pinterest, Follow us on Twitter, Instagram and Facebook.


Fun in the sun

❤When your Granny is your bestie!

Mermaids and beach fun for Memorial day. Nothing like a stress free day filled with fun ☀ and family. We even got to see mating manatees swimming along the shore while visiting Huguenot Park. 




#family #beach #summer #motherhood #love #momlife #mommyblogger #mermaids #nature #momblogger #HauteMomLifestyle #Hautemoms #potd

I’ve always believed that you are your child’s first teacher. Children model what they see at home, first. Learned behavior and beliefs shape who we are. What we believe IS who we are. Behavior is how we act based on what we believe. What we do is a result of what we believe. I guess the questions are: What are we teaching our kids at home? And What did we learn as kids that we are passing down? Or the lack there of. I mean, what can we teach our children that will secure their future and your family’s legacy?
Although I have 4 children, with the oldest being 17 and youngest 5, I found that children learn from when what you say and do mirrors one to another. As I grew up, I remember the saying, “Do as I say not what I do”. As a kid that meant just do what I say, but if you see me do something wrong just bypass that and remember what was said instead. Now! As a woman with kids and family of my own, I realize that that statement has caused me all kinds of confusion. At this point in my life I’m still coming to terms with a lot of things that I saw and knew was wrong but was told on the other hand what was right and I “should” do that. I have definetly thrown away that misconception of a myth that was passed down. I want what I say to be lived out as what I do. I want my kids to know that if I say it, my actions will back that up. For example, if I say don’t drink and drink…naturally I won’t be a person who drinks and drive because I first believe its wrong, I know its wrong, law supports its wrong, therefore, my actions will mirror my beliefs. Basically, we have to start practicing what we preach to our children. We have to lead solely by example. And be mindful of the things we allow our children to be exposed to. Because those things can allow contamination of our children. Children are more aware of what you do, then what you say. They are always watching and can’t wait for a moment to act like you. Children admire their parents, whether good or bad. Let’s be better teachers of life than the streets, blogs, videos, music, T.V., social media outlets and so on.

Are you leaving a legacy? Let’s talk about it.

Xoxo 💋


Science on the St. Johns River


This Saturday, October 24th 10am- 2pm is Science on the St. Johns River. It’s FREE for ages 18 & under. Lots of fun activities for the whole family to enjoy! Get out & enjoy some River fun this fall! Get more details with Fun 4 First Coast kids. Don’t forget to rsvp!

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#HML xoxo

Free for Kids


On November 1st some of Jacksonville’s greatest attractions will allow free entry for children 12 and under, with a paying adult! How cool is that! We are so excited! There are lots of family fun adventures in Jax this November. Some participating attractions include, Jacksonville Zoo and Gardens, Museum of Science & History, MOCA Jacksonville, Sweet Pete’s Candy, Adventure Landing and more! Visit Fun 4 first Coast Kids to see more participating attractions. #ilovejax